Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Team Tony

Project RAMPAGE Representatives, Rchan, Spore and Ore no Jonda-sama have formed up and created the T.Hawk Supercollective of Hawkness, Team Tony!

keeping true to their word of putting on shows and not sermons, the Project RAMPAGE Representatives, Rchan and Spore, along with Team Xialan's very own Ore no Jonda-sama, have discovered today, that T.Hawk, the Tony Hawk, is the one true balance to this very broken game that is, Super Street Fighter 4: Arcade Edition.

with minimal combos, a shitload of leniency on 360/720 motion SPDs and a sevenfold damage output, Tony packs the heat with his 1100 HP/Stun! Rchan, Spore and Ore no Jonda-sama today have brought him to greater heights (pun intended), exploring every single possibility with his Normals and Specials and thus creating 100% unique Team Tony setups into Ultras, Tomahawks and wins.

a wild random player was quoted at saying,

"i almost shit in my pants when Jonda got me down to 1 pixel after setting up 2 light SPDs in quick succession (he was Condor Spiring all over, i had no idea where to block!) and a forward throw to the corner. he started dashing towards me as i was on the ground... he dash at least 5 TIMES to come really close upon my wake up. fearing the grab, i jumped and he blew me up with a Heavy Tomahawk! i was completely and utterly defeated in every aspect of the word!"

Team Tony vows to bring the Mexican Waves tomorrow as they raging through Plaza Singapura! i'll leave you now with some wise words of wisdom from Team Tony,


Sunday, January 16, 2011

My Threshold Is Not In My Asshole

Swooning over a lobster. Hasn't anybody told you, a lobster is a shellfish pretending to be a crab?

The world is but a field of sunflowers, I am the cigarette. When kids are smiling for photos, they really look like they've stopped breathing. Night is home, with hawks and wolves. Hard is it to love, with sticks and stones. i don't think i'll ever be able to burn away that letter. not in this lifetime.

Sink or swim. Sink and get eaten by sharks. Swim and you swim with sharks. The rat community is made up of people who disregard grace and goodwill, are outright to harm, speak without think, thoughts so irrelevant. Revert is for the rebels who've been stuck in the machines, almost born of them, studying out a path for life, studying nothing. Deviate and dilate. Deviate to keep awake. Dilate like the lion's mane. It is set to run, bodily fluid sips through water laces in panties. Oh my God. It's not sex, it's not sex at all. A flower wilting is the closest you'll ever get to a reckoning of your existence.

I like the sound of things dirty, but can't stay clean for the life of me. I cannot tune the universe. Their instruments are broken, not out of tune. You've called the wrong bloke. 14 days into 2011 and this could be the worst. We can't compare stories. One subject remains, the other is a different entity altogether. My threshold is not in my asshole. Even in shallow water, there is a bait.

It must be nice to be a young and useless teenager.

Friday, January 7, 2011


let me tell you what i think about the new year,

i still think you are a joke. your whole life is a joke. everything about you is a joke. i see the arcade has recently given birth to a new kind of challenger, the Dogspammer, and he's really good. spam that 3-frame poke, spam that unpunishable move, fuck, do it at a range that'll never hit, but magically hits anyway into your fucking Ultra and win. the Dogspammer doesn't think, he just do it. he pick Ultra 1, and does the motion for Ultra 2, he don't think he just do it. unsafe Uppercut? you just do it. unsafe jump? you just jump it. even showing you the correct punishment to your unsafe move won't stop you from doing it again, you don't think, you just do it. you're like fucking having spasms in your fingers, you must be a really good masturbator.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

January 2011 With A Brand New Team Xialan!

it's a brand new year with the brand new Team Xialan. 俺のジョンダ様! x Miss Fors x Vx

Team Xialan has risen from the ashes like a burning blue phoenix and straight into 2011, blowing up the Round1.sg second anniversary tournament, running and bashing into her.

(much love to the players and staff of Project RAMPAGE.)

debuting officially as a threesome, we were blowing it up from all directions, Miss Fors on the live stream/chat, intoxicating Farp with her madness. Farp obviously wanted to have sex with her. Vx and 俺のジョンダ様! took to the main stage with the live commentary, endorsing microphones that RMPG. Ganguro would be proud of, "Baomic".

joining us, was none other then our Guest Commentator, the recently recovered RMPG. Spore, fresh from the snow in NYC, getting really salty with 俺のジョンダ様! midway through the tournament.

Miss Fors's rain boots were the most kickass shoes ever, tell her you love it.

(much love to the tech, staff and crew of Tornado/Colosseum/Arcadia/se7en)

and the night will never be complete, without a little bit of tilting, so i shall return now, to whatever form i was assuming, and you people can carry on, speaking before you're thinking.

Team Xialan is back, is here, and is staying.